I hate FaceBook

I'm faced with a horrible dilemma and all because of FaceBook. I was really happy to add J as my friend, after all he was my best friend's boyfriend in high school and we were fairly close at the time. All of this, of course, was years ago and light years away, but I was very happy to reconnect with him and to see he was doing well (and has a really cute kid with a great name). However, I was not so happy when a mail arrived in my in-box, via FaceBook, with a friend suggestion from J.

The friend suggestion that I received brings up horrible memories for me. Though horrible is probably a strong word; the person in question is lovely (actually, he is even better looking now then he was then) but he reminds me of one of the worst periods in my life. The time where I wasn't a very nice person, when I was selfish and self-oriented and way out of control. Though I'm sure that we did have lots of nice times together, I only remember one. Well, I try to forget that one time but it does come back to slap me upside the head from time to time but I try to push it out of my mind and I usually succeed. But now, I fear, I must deal with it. Either I choose to continue to forget (is that grammatically correct? ) or I deal with it.

I'm tempted to think that this is fate allowing me to face my one deepest regret and I am not sure that I'm quite ready for it (if I accept the friend suggestion I will have to express such regret). I'm also thinking that the person in question may not have the same memory of me (I'm hoping). I'm also wondering if J remembers and if the friend suggestion was done on purpose (and did he send the same suggestion to the person in question and will he accept???).

So, the point of this post is ... FaceBook can wreck havoc on your sleep, but nothing a lot of caramel vodka can't help with.

Other than that, I have not been posting much recently because between being busy at work, with monsters (DFEH ... Dear Future Ex-Husband, has been MIA for a month), LICE, and roomie, I have not had a lot of time for myself.

Of note, LB (Lover Boy) has been particularly amorous of late, which may be his way of competing with roomie. It has been very nice, but .... but I don't take it seriously at all. It gives me something to look forward to in the morning but I trust it as much as I trust him, which doesn't add up to much.
Things are going very well with roomie, a hell of a lot more than I expected. I so wish that I were attracted to him, but sadly, am not.

I just really wish I could meet a person who was a combo of the two (and wasn't married and who lives in the same country!).
That and that the LICE issue would go away.

weekend bla bla

This is a bit random (yes, I do realize most of the things I say are random), but I'm really tired as I'm not used to have to dealing with three kids. Not that I'm complaining, especially since the spawn (said in the most endearing way) gave me the warmest welcome of the three when I got home tonight. God, I love that kid.

Had a great weekend away with my future ex-mother and grandmother in law. We went to see a basketball game with G's grandmother on Saturday and it was really funny listening to her introduce me to everybody: "ummm, here is the mother of the older ones". We did what we could with Halloween and we did this (and no, I'm not having a very lice day at all!) and I still can't get the hang of knitting.

I also mentioned, in passing, to LoverBoy that P was coming to stay for awhile.... I wish I could say that he got all het up about it, that he asked me lots of questions and that he was jealous, but of course he was not. OK, I was really vague about it and he was not paying attention, so I'm going to have to go through it all again, but he can't say I did not warn him (I said I was "stressed about coming back to Paris with the three kids, going back to work and oh, by the way, I have a friend staying with me for a while and how are you?").

Speaking of, he will be here in about an hour and I'm slightly pissed and nervous and tired and really scared by the fact that I got excited about his being around earlier. I even imagined getting off with him, but that must have been just to take my mind off the fact that my metro line was out, again, tonight.

random sighting of the day: "Votez Obama" on the line 9... fingers crossed!

my comment for the day